Lots of life happened in March and April, most of it adding to my stress load. Our life was thrown in to a blender. Everything felt like chaos. Finances. Homeschool. Keeping up with chores and laundry. Mothering. Wife-ing. Vehicles. Sleep. Health.
Ironic how the fruits of the Spirit for March and April were joy and peace. Everything going on those months was anything but joyful and peaceful. Did I pass the test of having joy and peace amidst the chaotic waves of life? From where I sit, I think I failed miserably. I haven’t had the courage to ask others in my life what they think.
I did however do two things in the months of March and April:
- Pay my doctor a visit and have some tests done to rule out some health concerns
- Open up in detail to a few people about the reality of my family’s situation. A dear friend reminded me I cannot walk through life trying to hide what’s really going on. Community is part of trusting in the Lord, and no one can really know how to help or pray if I try to keep up appearances that things aren’t so bad. As much as I want to be independent and prove to the world I don’t need anyone or anything, I really do need Christ and I need community. A ton.
So instead of practicing joy and peace in the middle of great stress, I’ve learned to let go of my pride … which as it turns out has brought me joy and peace in the process.
Funny how that works.